Gift Guide

5 Products For When You Just Need To F*cking Relax

It’s been entirely too long.

A couple of months ago, comedian, author, and COVID-era breakout star Sarah Cooper tweeted, “Are you feeling down? Isolated? Uncertain about the future? Worried about what comes next? Then you may be suffering from... consciousness.” It’s a sentiment we feel in our bones, especially because the last time we relaxed may very well have been during another calendar year.

Look, we aren’t sorcerers — we have exactly zero magic pills that will immediately alleviate the collective and personal stress of 2020. What we can, in good faith, offer is a handful of goodies to take the edge off. It’s a start, don’t you think?

The Brands

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1. A Drop of Calm

Unlike many of the sea of CBD companies out there, Plant People provides lab reports for each of its proprietary hemp-based formulas. This particular tincture, to be used daily, is designed to promote balance, and reduce stress and inflammation.

Drops+ Mind + Body, $39.99, Plant People.

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2. A Highly Intelligent Meditation Device

We will be the first to admit that we’ve tried meditation and run into some roadblocks — like, you know, dozing off during a session. This device helps keep you present with dynamic vibrations while tracking your physical responses over time. According to customer reviews, it’s a “game-changer.”

Core Meditation Trainer, $169, Core Meditation.

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3. Chew On This

Mood chews, you say? The citrus-flavored contents of this pretty tin are formulated to target the body’s hormone levels in a way that helps manage stress, anxiety, and feeling overwhelmed. Although that describes us pretty much all the time right now, the instructions suggest popping a chew once daily or 20 minutes before entering a particularly eek situation.

Original Mood Chew, $30, PYM.

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4. A Reason To Cheers

If you can’t decide between hibiscus dragon fruit, rooibos blood orange, and tulsi lemon flavors, try this variety pack of caffeine-free, no-sugar-added drinks. They’re formulated with ingredients like L-theanine, an amino acid found in tea, and ashwagandha, a medicinal herb, thought to aid in relaxation.

Experience Every Moment, $29, Moment.

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5. A Scent Of Natural Zen

Presuming you don’t live in Northern California, you might not make it to the Redwoods National and State Parks anytime soon. But that doesn’t have to stop you from carrying a bit of their magic with you. This compact rollerball is infused with soothing hemp essential oils and a handful of other all-natural ingredients. Who cares if you’re the only one smelling you?

Redwood Coast - 15ml Rollerball, $30, Fog & Tree.